HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
 
Newest Reviews
Armitage III: Polymatrix
Girls NIte Out
Moxie!
Five Women for the Killer
Dolce Vita, La
Pig
I Am Belmaya
Lodger, The
Show, The
Beta Test, The
Medium, The
John and the Hole
Survivalist, The
Ape Woman, The
Black Widow
Cop Secret
Dark Eyes of London, The
V/H/S/94
Fay Grim
Night of the Animated Dead
Freshman Year
Escape Room: Tournament of Champions
Anne at 13,000 Ft.
Even Mice Belong in Heaven
Death Screams
Freakscene: The Story of Dinosaur Jr.
Demonia
East, The
Mandabi
Seance
Green Knight, The
Beasts of No Nation
One of Our Aircraft is Missing
Picture Stories
Another Round
Tape, The
Limbo
Supernova
Man Who Sold His Skin, The
Sweetheart
   
 
Newest Articles
Super Silents: Early Universal Vol. 2 on Blu-ray
Fable Fear: The Singing Ringing Tree on Blu-ray
Gunsight Eyes: The Sabata Trilogy on Blu-ray
Bloody Bastard Baby: The Monster/I Don't Want to Be Born on Blu-ray
Night of the Animated Dead: Director Jason Axinn Interview
The ParaPod: A Very British Ghost Hunt - Interview with Director/Star Ian Boldsworth
On the Right Track: Best of British Transport Films Vol. 2
The Guns of Nutty Joan: Johnny Guitar on Blu-ray
Intercourse Between Two Worlds: Twin Peaks Fire Walk with Me/The Missing Pieces on Blu-ray
Enjoy the Silents: Early Universal Vol. 1 on Blu-ray
Masterful: The Servant on Blu-ray
70s Sitcom Dads: Bless This House and Father Dear Father on Blu-ray
Going Under: Deep Cover on Blu-ray
Child's Play: Children's Film Foundation Bumper Box Vol. 3 on DVD
Poetry and Motion: Great Noises That Fill the Air on DVD
Too Much to Bear: Prophecy on Blu-ray
Truth Kills: Blow Out on Blu-ray
A Monument to All the Bullshit in the World: 1970s Disaster Movies
Take Care with Peanuts: Interview with Melissa Menta (SVP of Marketing)
Silent is Golden: Futtocks End... and Other Short Stories on Blu-ray
Winner on Losers: West 11 on Blu-ray
Freewheelin' - Bob Dylan: Odds and Ends on Digital
Never Sleep: The Night of the Hunter on Blu-ray
Sherlock vs Ripper: Murder by Decree on Blu-ray
That Ol' Black Magic: Encounter of the Spooky Kind on Blu-ray
   
 
  Voyage of the Rock Aliens Never Fear, Pia Is Here
Year: 1984
Director: James Fargo
Stars: Pia Zadora, Craig Sheffer, Tom Nolan, Ruth Gordon, Michael Berryman, Alison La Placa, Gregory Bond, Craig Quiter, Patrick Byrnes, Marc Jackson, Jeffrey Casey, Jimmy Haddox, Marshall Rohner, Jeffrey Cranford, Troy Mack, Peter Cullen, Jermaine Jackson
Genre: Musical, Comedy, Science Fiction, RomanceBuy from Amazon
Rating:  6 (from 1 vote)
Review: This robot 1359 (voiced by Peter Cullen) is seeking an appropriate planet for the crew of the flying V guitar-shaped spaceship to investigate, and after dismissing a few choices it takes a closer look at Earth where he observed a couple of rival gangs who were pitted against one another since Dee Dee (Pia Zadora) felt a romantic attraction to Rain (Jermaine Jackson), in spite of being on different sides. There was a big fight which 1359 thought would be worth a project, and so reanimated the crew, led by ABCD (Tom Nolan). They were only too keen to get down to the surface and find out more...

Though what they did find out had nothing to do with Jermaine Jackson: if you were wondering where he had gone or indeed what that opening five minutes had to do with the rest of the movie, that can be explained by the year this was released being the same as the one he and Pia Zadora had a hit with When the Rain Begins to Fall, and they wanted to shoehorn the video into this somehow. Actually, the way the rest of this played out was as a musical comedy with kitschy science fiction elements, which made it sound like a precursor to Earth Girls are Easy, which it did resemble to an extent, though that was assuming anybody much had seen this little item.

The history of its distribution is a murky one, but it was the fourth and final attempt to make a movie star of Pia before she found her music career more successful, not that she needed the money being married to a multimillionaire who was funding her tries at stardom, much to the derision of audiences (although John Waters confessed he was a fan, which is why she's in Hairspray). By this stage, what few people who wanted to see a vehicle for Pia were not numerous enough to justify a wide cinematic release for Voyage of the Rock Aliens, that in spite of it probably being her most enjoyable move as leading lady.

It was no masterpiece of course, but as part of that love the eighties had for the pop culture of the fifties it was a surprisingly breezy example, with all the brightly-hued accoutrements that decade brought to the party. If Troma had deigned to make a musical in 1984, it would have looked a lot like this, although they would likely have gone overboard with intentional bad taste whereas all the bad taste here was unintentional (or so you had to assume). The plot is merely an excuse to hang a bunch of pleasingly catchy numbers on, so we had just about every set of characters getting their chance in the limelight, though Michael Berryman fans would be let down to see he didn't sing, though he did get to play a maniac with a malfunctioning chainsaw.

Pia did get to sing however - a lot, and now the grumblings about her backing had died down it was possible to see she could have been an Annette Funicello for the eighties if her movie career had been managed better. With common concerns to that decade such as pollution (which has created a tentacle monster in the nearby bay) and just how garish your fashion choices should be, we watched Craig Sheffer as Dee Dee's boyfriend take umbrage about her new interest in ABCD, as meanwhile everyone apparently tries to hook up with everyone else - there was even a scene where the alien leader's female attracting device goes wrong and he disappears under a mound of the male cast members. Sheffer got a song to mime to as well, where he prowls around with a wildcat while stripped to the waist, looking uncannily like Bruce McCulloch from The Kids in the Hall performing a spoof. Needless to say, this was screamingly camp, entirely disposable and very silly, but it was fun. Embarrassing to admit perhaps, but fun.
Reviewer: Graeme Clark

 

This review has been viewed 2199 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (0)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star probably has psychic powers?
Laurence Fishburne
Nicolas Cage
Anya Taylor-Joy
Patrick Stewart
Sissy Spacek
Michelle Yeoh
Aubrey Plaza
Tom Cruise
Beatrice Dalle
Michael Ironside
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Andrew Pragasam
Graeme Clark
Darren Jones
Jason Cook
Enoch Sneed
  Desbris M
  Paul Tuersley
  Chris Garbutt
   

 

Last Updated: