Newest Reviews
12 Hour Shift
Filmmaker's House, The
Intergalactic Adventures of Max Cloud, The
Spoilers, The
Killer Therapy
Man Upstairs, The
Bloodhound, The
New Mutants, The
Flame of New Orleans, The
Ham on Rye
Imperial Blue
August 32nd on Earth
Don is Dead, The
Seven Sinners
Body of Water
About Endlessness
Let It Snow
Deliver Us from Evil
Shark Attack 3: Megalodon
Midnight Sky, The
Lego Star Wars Holiday Special, The
Mon Oncle Antoine
Blast of Silence
Blackout, The
Stars in Your Eyes
Climate of the Hunter
Farewell Amor
Let's Scare Julie
Okko's Inn
Shaolin vs. Wu Tang
Butt Boy
Dog of Flanders, The
Bushido Blade, The
Newest Articles
Network Double Bills: Seance on a Wet Afternoon and Ring of Spies
Chaney Chillers: Inner Sanctum Mysteries - The Complete Film Series on Blu-ray
Adelphi Extras: Stars in Your Eyes on Blu-ray
Toons for the Heads: Fantastic Planet and Adult Animation
Nature Girl: The New World on Blu-ray
Network Double Bills: Perfect Friday and Robbery
Network Double Bills: The House in Nightmare Park and The Man Who Haunted Himself
Newley Minted: The Strange World of Gurney Slade on Blu-ray
Bad Love: The Night Porter on Blu-ray
Brevity is the Soul of Weird: Short Sharp Shocks on Blu-ray
Get Your Ass to Mars: Total Recall on Blu-ray
Call the Professionals: Le Cercle Rouge on Blu-ray
When There's No More Room in Hell: Dawn of the Dead on Blu-ray
The Butterfly Effect: Mothra on Blu-ray
Living Room Theatre: Play for Today Volume 1 on Blu-ray
Didn't He Do Well: The Bruce Forsyth Show on DVD
Blood Wedding: The Bride with White Hair on Blu-ray
The Inhuman Element: The Ladykillers on 4K UHD
As You Like It, Baby: Breathless on Blu-ray
Stargazing: Light Entertainment Rarities on DVD
Down to the Welles: Orson Welles Great Mysteries Volume 2 on DVD
Herding Cats: Sleepwalkers on Blu-ray
Confessions of a Porn Star: Adult Material on DVD
They're Still Not Sure It is a Baby: Eraserhead on Blu-ray
Werewolves are Real: Dog Soldiers on Digital
  Knights of Bloodsteel Name that ore
Year: 2009
Director: Philip Spink
Stars: David James Elliott, Natassia Malthe, Christopher Lloyd, Christopher Jacot, Dru Viergever, Peter Bryant, Mark Gibbon, Mackenzie Gray, Heather Doerksen, Adrian Hough, Gwyneth Walsh, Michael Heltay, Julian Christopher, Deanna Milligan, Brenna O’Brien
Genre: Fantasy, Adventure, TV MovieBuy from Amazon
Rating:  5 (from 1 vote)
Review: From the creators of Tin Man, the sci-fi re-imagining of The Wizard of Oz, comes this sub-Lord of the Rings fantasy adventure. In the realm of Mirabilis, humans, elves and goblins depend upon a mystical ore called "bloodsteel" of which there is a drastic shortage. Monstrous sorcerer Dragon Eye (Mark Gibbon) wants a monopoly over the ore so he can revive his comatose son and go on to rule the world, but elven sorcerer Tesselink (Christopher Lloyd) learns of a prophecy foretelling the rise of four brave knights able to seek out the Crucible: a near-mythical inexhaustible supply of bloodsteel. Leading this quartet is his granddaughter, kickass super-babe Perfidia (Natassia Malthe), accompanied by vengeance-seeking Irish warrior John Serragoth (David James Elliot), sickly albino goblin Ber-Lak (Dru Viergever) and dandyish rogue Adric (Christopher Jacot). Together they embark on a perilous quest.

More Gary Gygax than J.R.R. Tolkien, Knights of Bloodsteel lumbers confusingly through a lot pseudo-mystical hoo-doo with conflicting prophecies and characters developing new super-powers at convenient moments in lieu of compelling human drama. The juvenile plot has that make-it-up-as-you-go quality in common with fantasy role-playing games, but while Dungeons & Dragons fans may warm nostalgically to familiar sword and sorcery situations involving latex goblins and CGI dragons, less forgiving viewers will find themselves faced with more questions than answers. Why do the elves have fangs? Why is Dragon Eye's son a human boy? Why does rescued peasant girl Maya (Deanna Milligan) harbour such contempt for heroine Perfidia? Why does Grell (Michael Heltay), the blind monk on whom our heroes rely to translate sacred scrolls, behave like such a panicky idiot? What happened to Christopher Lloyd's career? The Back to the Future star is wasted in the token Gandalf/Obi Wan Kenobi role, making an early exit.

On the positive side, this two-parter does take a brave stab at depth and complexity as an array of occasionally obtuse subplots finally coalesce into an intriguing theme of free will versus destiny. There are a handful of unique tweaks to the fantasy formula such as secret negotiations between minor good and evil characters to end hostilities, and the atypical allowance of goblins to be noble, self-sacrificing heroes. Despite sporting the same post-LOTR gritty, rough-hewn, Celtic visuals that have left so much fantasy cinema so tiresomely identical, there are some cool steampunk concepts and visuals with endearingly loopy ideas including clockwork grenades, propellor-driven missiles and a remote-controlled cyborg killer barmaid!

Hoary dialogue abounds and performances are largely pitched at pantomime level, with one or two exceptions. Christopher Jacot is great fun as foppish womanizer and wheeler-dealer Adric, who rouses an imperilled village into battle and learns he isn't quite as mercenary as he thought himself to be. Norwegian star Natassia Malthe shoulders most of the dramatic weight, sporting a clipped British accent and cute fangs, bringing conviction to a cliché. With feisty fantasy roles in the likes of DOA: Dead or Alive (2006), Skinwalkers (2006), and the forthcoming Vikingdom (2011) among others, Malthe is fast becoming DTV cinema's definitive amazon warrior-babe, though one wishes some writer would pen a sword and sorcery romp more worthy of her.

Reviewer: Andrew Pragasam


This review has been viewed 1724 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

Review Comments (0)

Untitled 1

Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.

Latest Poll
Which star probably has psychic powers?
Laurence Fishburne
Nicolas Cage
Anya Taylor-Joy
Patrick Stewart
Sissy Spacek
Michelle Yeoh
Aubrey Plaza
Tom Cruise
Beatrice Dalle
Michael Ironside

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Darren Jones
Andrew Pragasam
Stately Wayne Manor
Enoch Sneed
  Geraint Morgan
Paul Smith
  Lee Fiveash


Last Updated: