HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
Newest Reviews
Yes, God, Yes
Five Graves to Cairo
You've Been Trumped Too
Woman in Black, The
Elvis: That's the Way It Is
Man Who Laughs, The
Watch List
Giraffe
Kat and the Band
Echo
Perfect 10
Octaman
Red Penguins
China Syndrome, The
Babyteeth
Round-Up, The
Around the Sun
Once There Was Brasilia
Peripheral
Dead Pigeon on Beethoven Street
Ice
She Demons
Good Girls, The
Hail, Hero!
Faces in the Crowd
Tamango
Traitor, The
Tomorrow
Third Generation, The
Saxon Charm, The
Spy Intervention
Moonrise
Mulan
Killer with a Thousand Eyes, The
Vigil, The
Liberation of L.B. Jones, The
Wizard of Baghdad, The
Ride
Good Manners
Thirty Seconds Over Tokyo
   
 
Newest Articles
What Use is Grief to a Horse? Equus on Blu-ray
For God's Sake Strap Yourselves Down: Flash Gordon on 4K UHD Collector's Edition
Party Hard: Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure on Blu-ray
Network On Air: Nights in with ABC 2 - Your Faces are All Blurred!
Eve Knew Her Apples: The Lady Eve on Blu-ray
Network On Air: Tempo - Gallery One
Network On Air: Nights In with ABC 1 - Welcome Once Again to Manchester!
Transformative Apocalypses: Phase IV and Southland Tales
The Happiest Days of Their Lives: The Guinea Pig on Blu-ray
Faced Poe: Three Edgar Allan Poe Adaptations Starring Bela Lugosi on Blu-ray
Hard Luck, Buster: The Cameraman on Blu-ray
At the Hop: Mr. Vampire on Blu-ray
Divine Madness: Female Trouble on Blu-ray
Country Matters: Further Out of Town on Blu-ray
Bat-Damn: Was Joel Schumacher's Batman Really That Bad?
The Beat Goes On: Takeshi Kitano Collection on Blu-ray
Dream Treats: Scorsese Shorts on Blu-ray
It's Only Money: Laughter in Paradise on Blu-ray
A Regular Terpsichore: Dance, Girl, Dance on Blu-ray
Teenage Trauma: Baby Love on Blu-ray
The Happening: Pet Shop Boys It Couldn't Happen Here on Blu-ray
Who Watched The Watchmen?
The Golden Age of Colonic Irrigation: Monty Python Series 4 on Blu-ray
Lady of Pleasure: Lola Montes on Blu-ray
Take You to the Gay Bar: Funeral Parade of Roses on Blu-ray
   
 
  Doom Bloody Foolish Guff
Year: 2005
Director: Andrzej Bartkowiak
Stars: Karl Urban, Dwayne Johnson, Rosamund Pike, Deobia Oparei, Ben Daniels, Razaq Adoti, Richard Brake, Al Weaver, Dexter Fletcher, Brian Steele, Yao Chin, Robert Russell, Daniel York, Ian Hughes, Sara Houghton, Blanka Jarosova, Doug Jones
Genre: Horror, Action, Science FictionBuy from Amazon
Rating:  4 (from 1 vote)
Review: The year is 2046, and it is twenty years since the discovery of a portal in the Nevada Desert which, if entered, propelled you to a lost city on Mars - and would take you back as well, if that was your wish. But just as scientists endeavour to make sense of this new location, actually a very old one as far as they can work out, the near-hundred strong team are struck with a panic as something seems to be attacking their numbers, and back on Earth decisions must be made to help, and fast. To that end, a troop of Marines about to go on leave are abruptly reassigned to Mars, and their impressive arsenal pressed into service against a menace that may be alien - or from closer to home.

Computer game movies, that always goes well, doesn't it? Well, no, it's more accurate to observe it hardly ever goes well, and indeed frequently goes very stupid, but this is down to gaming and movie watching being very different beasts, no matter how alike the studios who collaborate to create the hybrids of the two would like you to believe. It was not so important how as they evolved, the narrative became key in gaming, since in film you were having a passive experience, and in games you were an active participant. Therefore yet again, the adaptation of the popular nineteen-nineties shoot-'em-up Doom proved to appeal to hardly anyone at the box office, and flopped as a result.

The trouble with that was thanks to certain aspects such as the plot in the game being elementary, merely an excuse to gain ever-increasing amounts of weaponry and slaughter ever-growing numbers of monsters with it, whereas for the film they had to make up some desperately basic rubbish about Mars and genetic experimentation for the basis of their narrative. Fair enough, this would have been about as simple as necessary for a version of Doom on the P.C., but as a film it was deadening in its lack of imagination, and when it tried to be clever, which thankfully was not too often, it came across as stupider, not smarter, and besides, there was one key aspect of the gameplay missing.

If you played Doom, the most striking element, one which was something of a pioneer in its way, was that first-person perspective, so you would see through the hero's eyes and point whatever weapon you had to hand in the appropriate direction. Now, a whole movie like that would have been something to witness, and justify the existence of this thing, as seen a few years later in the sounds-daft-but-is-actually-bright Hardcore Henry. Alas, cinematographer turned director Andrzej Bartkowiak was not allowed, or was reluctant, to make the entire project in that fashion, so what you got was a meagre five-minute interval near the end where our protagonist John Grimm (Karl Urban) finally got up to what you really wanted to see in a Doom movie, and it was by far the best bit of the film.

But set that aside, and it was a long wait till that part, and you had a very ordinary rip-off of James Cameron's Aliens with some very samey visuals gracing a barely there storyline. The cast had points of interest, for instance Dwayne Johnson when he was still billed as The Rock was the leader of the marines, and the role turned out to be well within his range as he hardly had to act at all. Rosamund Pike, then in the early stages of her screen career after honing her skills in the theatre, was merely called upon to explain the jargon and scream, as the scientist sister of Grimm, oh, and be subjected to some sexual harassment too (a spot of banter, supposedly). Richard Brake had something approaching a personality, but it was a putrid one he was asked to portray, so he was blatantly not long for the world once the soldiers jaunted to The Red Planet, and everyone else was anonymous aside from Dexter Fletcher in a "how is he still alive?" wheelchair. Yet another Mars movie that failed, before The Martian happened along. Music by Clint Mansell.
Reviewer: Graeme Clark

 

This review has been viewed 1462 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (0)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star is the best at shouting?
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Brian Blessed
Tiffany Haddish
Steve Carell
Olivia Colman
Captain Caveman
Sylvester Stallone
Gerard Butler
Samuel L. Jackson
Bipasha Basu
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Paul Smith
Darren Jones
Andrew Pragasam
  Lee Fiveash
  Mick Stewart
Enoch Sneed
  Dsfgsdfg Dsgdsgsdg
   

 

Last Updated: